Stepping into the Light: Gayle Petrillo's Journey from Survivor to Storyteller

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to the Living the Dream Podcast with Curveball. If you believe, you can achieve. Welcome to the Living the Dream with Curveball Podcast, a show where I interview guests that teach, motivate, and inspire. Today's guest is someone whose story is all about transformation, courage, and stepping into the light. Gail Petrillo is a burned survivor, and from a young age, she learned to navigate fear, self-doubt, and the pressure to stay invincible. But instead of staying invisible, Gail has chosen to intentionally step into the light. And she is sharing her journey through a podcast, her memoir, and on the stage. Gail's story is not just about survival, it's about reclaiming her identity, confidence, and voice. So, Gail, thank you for joining me.

SPEAKER_01 1:14

Thank you for having me as your guest, Curtis. I'm excited to be here.

SPEAKER_00 1:18

Why don't you start off by telling everybody a little bit about yourself?

SPEAKER_01 1:22

Sure. So, born and raised in upstate New York, Albany, lived there until I was 49, and then my husband and I decided to move out to Tucson, Arizona for the weather change. We love the desert, it's beautiful and warm and friendly. Although we've got a lot of critters, but it's great. And uh hubby and I have now been married. Let's see, next week will be 20 uh 46 years, so pretty awesome. And as you mentioned, I am a burn survivor. I was burned as a toddler and grew up wanting to be as invisible as possible. An event happened on September 12th, 2019, which got me sharing my story unexpectedly for the very first time on stage in front of 200 people.

SPEAKER_00 2:21

Okay, well, do you want to uh let the listeners know, you know, about the burn event or not?

SPEAKER_01 2:29

Yes, no, absolutely. So I was burned at two and a half. Uh, before my burn accident happened, I was a giggly girly girl who loved going new places and meeting new people. I was my mom's shadow and her best friend. So one beautiful fall day, it was chilly, and we left the house and we walked down the street to a neighbor's house for a mother-daughter tea party. And as we approached the house after crunching the beautiful fall leaves under our feet, we could smell the coffee and the fresh cookies as they were coming out of the oven. So we walked into the house and they had a high top kitchen table, and it was beautifully decorated with the lace tablecloth and real china and real silver. And as I went to get up on the stool to sit at the high top table, I saw those cookies on a platter, and I had to have one. So I reached for a cookie and I toppled a 40-cup percolator full of fresh coffee off the table and all over me. I had third and fourth degree burns on 40% of my body down to the bone. And my parents were told when I went into the hospital that the professionals didn't know if I would live or die. Obviously, when I came out of the hospital, I was a changed little girl. I was now fearful, afraid, lonely. I kept to myself. I struggled for years, as you can imagine, growing up with scars, even though they aren't seen by other people, I always saw them. And so I felt different and alone. And I struggled with shame and guilt, even though as a two and a half-year-old, it wasn't anything I could really control. And imagine my parents suffering all those years as well, not knowing what they could have done different to prevent it, which was nothing. But I know until the day my mom died three years ago, she lived with that awful guilt. And so fast forward, I had a wonderful career in healthcare. I ran hospital departments and large medical groups. I did clinical research, traveling the country for pharma, conducting audits on new drugs as they were coming to market. And I did what I had to do as an employee and as a healthcare leader. I was in front of people, I did what I had to do. But after I was in a meeting or traveling or whatever, I always came back into myself to protect myself, if you will. And I struggled for years with fears and phobias and self-doubt and imposter syndrome. I always wondered what people saw in me that I never saw in myself. And so to be in the public eye was very difficult. And so as soon as I was able to walk out of that more public way, I became much more introverted and felt more secure. Years later, back in 2018, I left healthcare. I created my own coaching business and it's called First Impressions. And it started very different than it is today. It started as an image consulting firm. I've always been obsessed with what I'm wearing and what other people are wearing. And so, what better way to help people than help them identify colors that look good on them, styles that look good on them, whether it's for a job interview, for working your first day, for being the mother or father of a bride, whatever. And so I started my business launching it with a fashion show. Year one, 2018, was very small, 50 people, maybe 20 exhibitors in a tiny hotel, and it was great. People encouraged me at that point to do another one. And they both of them, the second one in 2019, were fundraisers for a local nonprofit, Beats of Courage. I had met the founder Jean, who lives in Tucson, through a mutual friend who sat on her board of directors. So both year one and two, she was the beneficiary of the funds that we raised. Year one was tiny, year two was much bigger. I had over 200 in my audience at a huge resort here in southern Arizona. Um, I oversold my exhibitor booths. I was geared for 50, and I had over almost 60 exhibitors, and people were eating like um cucumber sandwiches, high-tea stuff, was sipping champagne. And as I was backstage with Jean, I said to her teasingly, I know your organization, even though founded in Tucson, isn't international. Where have you been? And her answer really surprised me. And my response to her shocked me. She said, I just spent two days in Phoenix at Phoenix Children's Hospital in the burn unit. No words came out, tears just started flowing down my cheeks, ruining my mascara. And as we all know, timing is everything. That's when the MC called me to the podium. So with speech in hand, I went in to up to the podium, although I wanted to run in the other direction. I didn't. I'm standing at the podium looking out at 200 people. The only person at the time who really knew my story was my husband. And so the tears are running, and I'm wiping my eyes, and I apologized to the audience and said, I'm sorry. I was just backstage with Jean. She mentioned having spent time with the burn in the burn unit at Children's Phoenix Hospital. I wish my family and I had had that kind of support when I was burned as a toddler. The silence in that audience, Curtis, was palpable. You could feel it, you could hear it, you could understand it. Dead silence. And so at that time, I didn't know what to do with the silence. So I just went on with my rehearsed speech, fully aware that that was the first time I had ever said out loud that I was a burn survivor. And as I was, as people were leaving the event, I went to the doors of the ballroom and thanked people for coming. And one woman, very well known in Tucson, although I didn't know her, looked at me, gave me a hug, and said, Girl, you've got a story to tell. And I was like, No, I don't. Sorry. But I'd love to learn more about you. And she suggested we go to coffee. That was September 12th, 2019. By that Christmas, she'd gotten my whole story out of me and encouraged me to write a children's book, which then became the foundation of my memoir, which was published last April of 2025. So no more secrets. I am learning that by sharing my story, I'm healing. By being vulnerable and shedding those secrets and sharing my story, people lean in because my story resonates with their stories, whatever their stories are, because we all experience trauma in one way or another. And so every time I share my story, I share a little bit more. And I am finally at 72, comfortable in my own skin. And I'm recognizing as I share my story, when people lean in, as they recognize their story and mine, they start to share their stories frequently to me for the very first time. So I'm finding that my story is inspirational, it's motivational. What I've also learned is that we are not alone. Whatever we have experienced, whether it's a divorce, whether it's a burn, whether it's other kinds of trauma, other people have struggled with exactly the same things we struggle with. And so by sharing our stories, we learn we're not alone. And other people learn they too are not alone. And so that to me makes the world a smaller place, a more comfortable place, a place we all want to be, and a place where where we can positively share our stories and grieve our losses together, but move forward together in a more positive way as well.

SPEAKER_00 11:54

Well, talk about some of the biggest fears and internal narratives that you you've had to overcome uh you know up to this point.

SPEAKER_01 12:03

Yeah, so my fears were everything everyone says and research proves that the number one fear people have is speaking in public, right? So what I have found, I was definitely afraid of speaking in public for years. And even though my career required it at times, my stomach would churn, I would get nauseous, and as I said earlier, the minute I would speak and I was done, I would retreat. So I've learned to overcome that fear. I now speak, my biggest audience has been 500. And what I find is I get, I don't know, sort of high on that adrenaline, and I love it. And I get the energy from the audience. But my other fears are fears that everyone struggles through for the most part: fear of heights, fear of snakes, fear of spiders, fear of being alone, fear of telling people who I am, right? That self-doubt, that person who just wants to be an introvert and not share anything about them. So for instance, when I was a teenager, I covered the mirrors in my room with sheets because I didn't want to look at myself. And I figured no one else wanted to look at me either. All through school, until my graduate degree, I never raised my hand in school because even though I knew the answers, I was afraid to show myself. I was afraid I would be wrong. I was afraid of judgment, what people would think of me if I asked a stupid question. So all those fears, Curtis, are similar fears to what everybody else in this world is fearful of. And one of the ways I've overcome it years and years and years ago, so we've been in Tucson for 27 years. Before we moved here, my husband and I realized we would run into desert creatures, right? Snakes in particular, big ugly spiders, um, javelina, coyote, bobcat, you name it, we knew we would run into it. And with my fears particularly of snakes and spiders, I decided to take a phobia course. And what I learned in that, what was supposed to be a six-week class and turned out to be about a three-month class of one-on-one with a psychiatrist studying. He wasn't a psychiatrist at the time. He was pursuing his PhD, and I was one of his subjects as he pursued his degree. And we met one-on-one through three months. First, we talked about touching a book with a snake in it, which I couldn't do. I learned to do that. Next was touching a rubber snake. I couldn't do that. Eventually, I could do that. I graduated from that phobia course by reaching into a terrarium, pulling out the most beautiful corn snake, orange and yellow. He was beautiful. And his name was Max. And I could eventually wrap Max around my arm and talk to him and then unwrap him when he got cold and put him back in his terrarium. So the things I learned there, I still draw from those tools in my toolbox to overcome things when I get afraid again, when the stomach churns and I'm going to speak before I actually get in front of an audience and feel that energy. Before I walk into a zoo and walk into a reptile exhibit, and no, I'm going to touch that glass. No, I'm going to touch a real snake being held by someone who works at the museum. All of those things. Driving a long distance, driving on a highway, like any of that. That fear of heights sometimes comes back. And I draw from the experiences of the phobia course where I learned to breathe. I was taught years ago, four, seven, eight, breathe in for the count of four, hold for a count of seven, and exhale for a count of eight. And your shoulders go back and untense, your whole body intenses, and you feel a release. And so those are just some of the things I've learned to overcome my phobias.

SPEAKER_00 18:09

Well, talk about uh what does visibility look like to you now versus in your younger life?

SPEAKER_01 18:17

Yeah. So as I said, I did everything intentionally for years to be invisible, not raising my hand in class, not doing anything that would call attention to myself. And now I have been fortunate enough to be on about 35 podcasts. And some of them are just audio. Some like these are audio and visual. I've overcome that fear. Um to be visible, I've been fortunate enough to be guest speakers at Rotary and Koanis, luncheons and breakfasts. I was the keynote speaker at for 500 people as a high at a high school graduation in 2024. I've been a speaker at women's conferences. I just spoke at one three or four weeks ago in Santa Fe. I was on stage telling my story in front of 50 women. And so being visible now is being visible on social media, being visible like this on podcasts, being visible on my website, sharing my podcast experiences, sharing my speaking experiences, talking about overcoming those fears, phobias, self-doubt, imposter syndrome, being visible so I can share my energy with people around me, whether it's one, three, thirty, three hundred. And that's what being visible now means to me. Sharing my story so I continue healing, and others get inspired and begin to share their story so they too can heal.

SPEAKER_00 19:57

Well, tell us about your memoir. Tell us uh uh what was the hardest part of part about writing it, what we can expect when we read it, and what did the process teach you of writing it?

SPEAKER_01 20:08

Yes. So the process actually was not very long. It took me about three months, which is not long in the publishing world, and this is it. And becoming visible is a culmination of stories about being bullied as a kid, about going to camp and seeing a snake and never returning to camp. Um getting involved with the Arizona Burn Foundation. I'm now the board chair of Red Cross of Southern Arizona, in part because I survived from plasma donations. And so I'm a very big proponent of people giving blood. We can't buy blood, we have to donate blood. And so um, being visible is a culmination of stories from when I was burned through growing up, through my career of being challenged, being spotted as an up-and-coming leader, what that meant going through Dale Carnegie courses, um, being encouraged and mentored by some amazing people, physicians, managers, leaders in and out of healthcare, family members who supported me, friends who have supported me. Um, one thing I didn't mention, Curtis, is that my family never talked about the accident. So I grew up, my some of my family members, let alone my friends and my parents' friends, never knew that I was a burn survivor. So now telling that story, people are very surprised. And as you read the book, you realize the importance of sharing our stories from the very beginning through current day, and that's what you can look forward to getting when you read the book.

SPEAKER_00 22:00

For someone listening out there who who might be hiding or still playing small, what's the first step they need to take to uh step into their own visibility?

SPEAKER_01 22:11

That's a great question. So growing up in the 50s and 60s, it was not encouraged, or you know, we were encouraged to not not share our dirty laundry, getting burned and having all that weight of that accident. We were we were not sharing our story, my mom's story, my story. Now we are in a world, fortunately, where people can share. And so I encourage people to reach out to organizations like the Arizona Burn Foundation, um, Phoenix World Burn. Um, if you're not talking burn and other trauma, there are support groups to help you. Um alcohol abuse, substance abuse, other trauma, divorce. There are support um organizations and systems. Tell a friend, tell a trusted person, whether it's clergy or someone else that you trust, tell your story to them. It latents. Your load, it takes the weight off your shoulders, and once you start sharing that story, it's so much easier to continue going deeper and deeper into the things that make us fearful, into the things that we want to continue to hide from. And so I encourage you, the other thing to do is smile because smiles are contagious, and smiles help other people smile with you. And that's just a way to open the door to the first part of sharing your story.

SPEAKER_00 23:54

Tell us about any other upcoming projects that you're working on that listeners need to be aware of.

SPEAKER_01 24:00

Yeah. So, like this, I'm going to be on a few more podcasts, and I always promote them on social media. So if you follow me on my website, www.firstimpressionsthenumber one.com, you will see where I am. In addition to that, you can buy my book off my website, and I'm on social media on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, all of that. And so I encourage your listeners to help follow me.

SPEAKER_00 24:30

That was my next question. First impressionsthenumber one.com. So close us out with some final thoughts. Maybe if that was something I forgot to talk about that you would like to touch on, or any final thoughts you have for the listeners.

SPEAKER_01 24:44

Yeah, I think a final thought is we don't know what we're missing when we're hiding behind things. Whatever that curtain is, once we move that curtain out of the way and we let ourselves shine, knowing that we're not alone, knowing that we have important things to share, to talk about, knowing how smart we are, those are things that we want to help each other broadcast, help each other come out of hiding, help each other tell our secrets, help each other be more visible, support each other in any way we possibly can. Know we're not alone and share our smiles.

SPEAKER_00 25:35

Absolutely, ladies and gentlemen. Gail is so brave for having the courage to share her story. So if you or somebody else you know um is having issues sharing their story or wanting to play as invisible or small, please follow rate review, share this episode to as many people as possible. Go pick up Gail's memoir, visit her website at first impressions one that's the number one dot com. And share that website to everybody that you know. And also share the show and the website to everybody you know to keep up with all things living the dream. www.curveball337.com, where you can leave us a review, drop us any comments that you might have, and and also leave us some fan mail that could even get played on the show. Thank you for listening and supporting the show. And Gail, thank you for being so curt uh having so much courage to share your story. Thank you for all that you do, and thank you for joining me.

SPEAKER_01 26:38

Thank you, Curtis. What a pleasure.

SPEAKER_00 26:41

For more information on the Living the Dream with Curveball Podcast, visit www.curveball337.com. Until next time, keep living the dream.