From Frames to Freedom: Roman Wyden on Filmmaking, Coaching, and Life Lessons

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to the Living the Dream. You can achieve. Welcome to the Living the Dream with Curveball Podcast, a show where I interview guests that teach, motivate, and inspire. Today's guest is award-winning filmmaker, entrepreneur, and life coach, Roman Wyden. Roman has built a multifaceted career filled with diverse and impactful projects. His portfolio is amazing. It contains films like Ageless Wisdom, Defaced, Max, and Ricky Lemon. So we're going to be talking to him. He's also produced content for high-end clients such as Chrysler. So we're going to be talking to Roman about his career and everything that he's up to and gonna be up to and uh any any uh projects upcoming that he might be working on that he can tell us about. So, Roman, thank you for joining me.

SPEAKER_00 1:19

My pleasure, my pleasure. Thank you for having me. It's good to be here.

SPEAKER_01 1:23

Why don't you start off by telling everybody a little bit about yourself?

SPEAKER_00 1:27

Yeah, you know, I love that question. It's always confronting, right? It's like, what part of me actually matters? Um, so what I will say is I grew up in Europe, I grew up in Switzerland, I moved to the US uh in my early 20s, and I wanted to become an actor. I just had that dream. I've always been a performer. I was a DJ when I was in my early teens. I got paid to DJ on weekends. Um, I always felt creative, but didn't know exactly how to express myself. Didn't think DJ was an artist at the time. It was just something I fell into. But then suddenly I was like, you know what? I think I want to go to the United States and become an actor. So I was very naive. I moved uh over here, first to San Diego, then to LA. I was like, I'm just gonna give this a shot. And so I chased that dream for um, I would say a good, you know, 10 plus years. It's funny I still act today, but it's I'll get into that later. It's part of me. Um, but what I realized at the time is I wanted to um be behind a camera and kind of call the shots more than just you know going to interviews and be rejected or accepted. So I went to film school. I got my uh bachelor fine arts in filmmaking and directing at the uh Art Center College of Design in Pasadena. And I started a production company and and you know, at the time with my ex-wife, um we had some clients that we meant after. And one account that was small at the beginning suddenly became a bigger account and it started growing. And we had clients like the VA, Proctor and Gamble, Kimberly Clark, Bravo, and you know, we just we we got to work on some cool projects. And at some point, for me, that chapter was done, and I went into commercial real estate as an entrepreneur. Uh, I always say I'm really hard to employ because I don't want to be employed. So, as an entrepreneur, I um decided to invest some money in commercial real estate and did that for five years. That went really well. Then there was an issue with the market and with one of her properties, and so over the last couple of years, I've been completing that chapter of mine. And now what I do is I coach men essentially through their midlife crisis to reinvent themselves uh from an aligned place. So that's I guess a little bit about me.

SPEAKER_01 3:57

Well, I know that uh in your amazing portfolio, you have a film coming out talking about ADHD. So, you know, um kind of let the listeners know about that. Or you, you know, you can also talk about uh some of the other films that that you have produced.

SPEAKER_00 4:16

Absolutely. Yeah, I mean, my film career really started with short films. I probably produced about a dozen short films um that I'm very proud of. And um before this documentary, I produced a film called Quail Lake, and that is uh available on Amazon for free. You can watch it. It's a my first feature film. It was very low budget, and it's just I wanted to experience uh doing a feature film because I'd only done short films and short content for clients, and so that was a really great experience. It's not an experience I need to do again, but currently still in production on a feature documentary, which is on ADHD. And that was inspired by my own son, Kai, who's now 17. But when he turned seven, uh the school said we should get him diagnosed, and we had him diagnosed and uh or tested, they said, right? And he was diagnosed with ADHD and autism and dyslexia, and like it was like six uh labels. And to me, that was just insane. And I was like, that's not how can you label a seven-year-old and say that that's what he has? And essentially what they're not telling parents is like, well, that's what your child has, and then in parenthesis for life, right? That's the unspoken part because parents hear that as in, like, oh, I have a disordered child. They don't hear, oh, your child's struggling with some things at seven years old. Let's support you other than taking pills with guiding your child through the phases of childhood and then adulthood, right? So that's what the documentary is about, really kind of exposing the lies or the I call it the half-truths around ADHD. It's the mainstream media that sort of peddles the same old narratives that actually have been debunked uh time and time. And uh, we can get into details certainly later if you'd like, but that's the documentary that's still in the works. There's a podcast uh also uh called ADHD's over, uh, that's out. And there's also a book that I wrote last year in September, and that's now uh that's available on Amazon, Barnes ⁇ Nobles. So that's me basically uh sharing or spreading the message um, you know, of what what I've discovered in 10 years of research.

SPEAKER_01 6:34

Well, talk to the listeners about what is uh ADHD, and uh, I guess from hearing you talk, you don't feel like it's a a real medical disorder. So kind of explain that too.

SPEAKER_00 6:46

Yeah, um, that's correct. It is not a medical disorder because based, you know, on a definition of what a medical disorder is, which is to simplify it for the listeners, a medical disorder is discovered. That can be discovered by three people around the world, and it's discovered in the same way, and it's the same biomarkers and the same blood tests, and it all matches, right? ADHD is is is purely um observation, um subjective observation, and there are no blood tests, and there are no biomarkers, so it is a psychiatric disorder. Psychiatric disorders are invented, meaning they are voted on, right? You don't have people vote in a different country of what a tumor is or what cancer is, right? Because it's not invented, it's discovered, because it has actual medical evidence. ADHD does not, and a lot of parents don't know that. They think, oh, it's a you know, when I often say people ask, well, what's your uh project called? And I say ADHD is over, right away, if they feel attacked, which I'll get into what that means. Well, I can just say quickly, people so often make ADHD their identity. It goes from something I struggle with to now that's who I am. So when I say ADHD is over, if they feel triggered and attacked, they will say, Oh, so you're saying it's not real. And it's interesting because at the beginning I would just say no. That, you know, that's not what I'm saying. Now I just say, like, yeah, it's not a real medical disorder. The struggles are real, but the label has been invented, the label was voted on. The label is not real per se. And only the people who get it, I believe, have a chance at um moving past that and actually just working on what I would call dissolve their quote unquote symptoms, right? Change their behaviors, rewire their brains so that they're less hyperactive, less impulsive, less uh, you know, the ability to focus returns, so to speak, or or sharpens again. So that's kind of in a nutshell what is ADHD? Now you can Google it and say, oh, it's a, you know, it's attention deficit, hyperactivity disorder. Um, there's certain symptoms, like I said, there's um, you know, impulsivity, hard time focusing, hyperactivity. Not all of them have hyperactivity, but you know, you could look it up and sort of see what the definition is in the DSM. Uh, the diagnostic statistical manual that has all the mental disorders in there. And again, they were all invented. Everything in that book was invented and voted on by a few people in a boardroom. Um, and that's a fact.

SPEAKER_01 9:39

Well, you talked about dissolving the symptoms. So talk about what what parents uh with kids that have ADHD can do to help dissolve the symptoms.

SPEAKER_00 9:50

Yeah, it's a really great question. I get this a lot, and it's interesting. I've since moved, I used to do more neurodiverse family coaching, and I realized it's not what people want. And here's what I'm gonna say. So I'm gonna tell you what I mean, and then I'll I'll answer your question, but it'll give us some context. So, in my opinion, and this has been backed up by countless experts who have written books and who are world-renowned. Uh, Dr. Gabor Mate, Dr. Bruce Lipton, Dr. Stephen Porgis. These are all experts that are either ADHD researcher experts, or they're adjacent, meaning they're uh uh Stephen Porgis deals with the nervous system. You have um Peter Levine, who's a trauma expert. You have Bruce Lipton who works with epigenetics, right? So it's all connected and they're all pointing towards the same thing. It's not a disorder, meaning there's not a broken brain we're looking at. There's a certain wiring that the brain has. We all do have a different wiring. That's why I hate the term neurodiverse, because we're all neurodiverse. Every single brain, like there's no brain like Curtis's brain, there's no brain like Roman's brain. It's unique. So we're all neurodiverse. So the wiring is what actually causes someone to behave a certain way, right? And most likely, and I'm not pointing at one thing, but stressors in a human being's life early on in childhood are very much responsible for a certain wiring of that person's brain. So the environment that that child grows up in has more to do with the wiring that then produces the behavior that then we call symptoms, that then we label as ADHD, than anything else. ADHD is not genetic. Epigenetics has proven that you're never predetermined to get something like ADHD. You're predisposed because what happens is the genes in our DNA get turned on or off through the effect of the environment. So that means it can be rewired. You can you can turn off or on a gene. So you're never stuck with ADHD. Therefore, it's not genetic. Because when parents hear genetic, what they hear is, oh, there's nothing I can do. That's just not true, right? So what parents can do, and here is I'll say it in a very simplified form remove as much stress from the entire family unit's environment. And I guarantee you, even a year later, things will shift. Now, when I say stress, I would have to give it a quick definition, if I may. So, for example, a lot of parents choose their schools for their children based on what the parents think is the right school. And they make that decision, and I start with school because it's one of the biggest stressors, they make that decision based on society's idea of what's right for a child, not their child. Nobody knows their child. But we may we have these assumptions that if you go to this school, which is the best school on paper, then you can go to that school, which is the best school in the state, then you can go to this university, which is the best university in the world, then you'll get a good career, then you'll make enough money, then you'll be happy. Now I'm relaxing because now I know that you're going to have a good life. Look, every parent, of course, wants their child to turn out and be happy. But let me tell you, parents listening, do not, this is my unsolicited advice, do not force your child into a school that you think is right for them. Actually invest some time and money, if you can, to try different schools. Like if your child is stressed out at a school because of homework and grades and expectations and even social circles, that's not the right school. Why would you force your child to stay in a school that brings extra stress to their nervous system, especially if they're what we call neurodiverse, if they're already very sensitive humans? Sensitivity is a good thing, by the way. I'm not saying this in a negative way, but they're taking in so much information and they're they're so sensitive to all the noises and the colors and the everything in the world, right? So the last thing you want to do is add more stress. So school is super important, is to have a school that your child can, I don't want to say relax into, but that they feel that they like and they're okay at. So there's a lot of tension and a lot um of stress that that causes, right? And then there's some other ones, and I'm gonna get to a closing here and wrap it up with what the parents really can do, other than just reduce stress. Another one here is people always say, oh, ADHD is caused by screens or by uh food dyes or you know, things like that. Look, yes, that doesn't help, but those are not the causes. That exacerbates an already stressed nervous system and an already um, I don't want to call it a it's not a difficult wiring, but it's a wiring of the brain that causes friction between the environment and the child, right? So, yes, of course you want to eat healthy, you want to reduce screen time, you want to add more exercise and so forth. That's that those are very important, but the most important ones are really the schools, the parents' relationship, and then the third one, and also super important, is the emotional intelligence of the parents. I don't understand why we don't have parenting classes before someone has a baby. Mandatory. I'm not kidding. Mandatory parenting classes. Because when you take a driver's license, you got to go take a test. Everybody's got to do a written and a driver test to drive a car. You can figure out how to drive a car in a week at the age of 16 or 17 or 18, and you're like pretty good at it. You're like, I got this, right? But to have a child, there's no test, no required anything. Okay, we got to change that. And I'll tell you why. Because one thing I've learned, and I'm also a certified uh conscious parenting coach, and I always like to um sort of boil it down to one sentence. What is my conscious parenting coaching about? It's about, here's very simple. Your presence is enough. Meaning, if you're a very present parent and you're there and available with the least amount of judgment, we're human, we all judge, right? But the least amount of judgment, the least amount of manipulation and blackmail and forcing and you know, conditional love, like all the stuff that we're learning is really harmful. If you can be just present with your child when they're going through something, that's going to make a difference. So if your stressed out child is acting out, the last thing to do is to punish them, to yell at them, to force them to do this or that. Last thing. What we have to do is, and this is just a metaphor for my advice, is to get down to their level. So if your child's five or six, you kneel down on your knees physically. So your eye level, you're not looking down at them. That makes a difference. You look into their eyes, you breathe with them, you hold space, and you basically allow them to have what they're having. I see that you're really upset. Let's have the upset. I get it. This must be really upsetting. Now, if they start hitting you or someone else, obviously we have boundaries. We say that's a no-no. If you're gonna hit someone, then I'm gonna have to put, you know, take you to your room and you're gonna have to stay in the room until you're calmed down. But if you need anything in the room, let me know, right? We have to become really, really connected and present to their emotions and what they're actually going through. Even if we don't know what it is, we gotta stay there and not make them wrong for the experience they're having. And most people might be like, Yeah, I know, I know, I know. Most parents don't do that. I didn't used to do that. It was hard for me to do it until I had to remind myself again and again and again. No yelling, no reacting, no punishing, no judging in those moments. Yes, there's consequences. We'll talk about that later. You will face certain consequences, of course, right? That's how kids learn how to not repeat stupid stuff, and or adults too. But so, anyway, so those are my three big ones. And they're all inside of the context of removing as much stress out of the environment of a child's life, right? Is truly the work. And that includes parents going to therapy, parents taking 12-step programs. I always say parents go first. If you have a child that's diagnosed with ADHD, there's nothing wrong with your child, your child is not broken, your child is not the problem, but you have the power to help them through this phase of life. That would be my advice. I know that was a mouthful.

SPEAKER_01 20:07

Well, let's talk about uh ADHD medicines. Uh, do you feel like they are safe and effective?

SPEAKER_00 20:15

Uh no and no. So, what I mean by that, if you it depends what you it depends what your definition of safe and effective is, right? So, first of all, I want parents to know that uh medic uh ADHD medication such as Adderall or Ritalin are on the DEA, right? It's the drug, what is it, the drug enforcement agency. Um the DEA, you can you can go online and look this up on their website. Drugs are listed in schedules, like Schedule 1, Schedule 2, Schedule 3. So Adderall and Ritalin, I believe Schedule 1 are the worst, and then schedule two are the next worst. And you know Adderall and Ritalin are Schedule 2 drugs that are listed amongst drugs such as meth, cocaine, and fentanyl. Just want parents to know that. Now, some parents say, yeah, but it's not the same amount that you give we give less. Yeah, but your child's seven. So what does that mean? It's less. It's still government scheduled as a highly addictive substance with fentanyl, meth, and cocaine, right? You just gotta know these things. So now when you look at the side effects in all the cases where kids have some have died, uh, but mostly just really bad side effects like stunted their growth, uh, lack of sleep, lack of appetite. That's not good for a child seven, eight years old, to not sleep well, to not eat well, if you know what I mean. So, with some kids, we'll never we won't know until they're like in their 40s what you know, suddenly people are sick and we're like, I don't know why I'm sick. I work out all the time. Time. So it's hard to prove what what caused what. But it is a fact that there are a lot of side effects, and some of them are really bad. So to me, that's not safe. Safe is to have once in a while somebody complain that they have a headache, you know, or that they're dehydrated or something like that. That's fairly safe, I would say. We're talking about millions of cases in the US alone. Um, so that's about the um safety. Are they effective? Well, they are effective for a period of time. So there's an MTA study, there's a study called the MTA study that a lot of pro-medication experts reference. And they say, well, based on the MTA study, uh, you know, children who have taken uh ADHD medication have shown uh uh significant improvement in academic results, right? Academic performance. Well, true, but it's a half truth. I'll tell you why. Yes, it's true that for one to two years, that was the case. From two to five years, that completely reversed and went down. In other words, kids, there was no longer a benefit academically after two years, but they never tell you that. They say, Yeah, yeah, based on this study, um, it improves academic performance. So is it effective? Somewhat effective, right? So we have to understand that because that's kind of the main reason why parents decide to medicate their children, because they're like, well, I don't want the academic performance to suffer, because that's why, right? They don't necessarily do it. Some may do it for the reason of like, I don't want a crazy child at home. But trust me, um if those kids got really good grades at school and they were a little crazy at home, I think parents would just figure it out. But it's mostly the academic performance that parents are um scared would drop or would not, you know, happen. So they medicate. I'm not anti-medication. Um, I believe this is my my intrinsic belief that Western um medicine, right? Like the medications that are pharmaceutical have their place. And I always say their place is for emergencies. When you have an emergency situation and you need to be stitched up and you need pain medication, or you are really can't function, or the body can't be in a state where they can operate. Of course, you will you want to be given medications, right? But those are emergencies. ADHD is not an emergency. So I believe this is my personal belief, that it is our our responsibility as parents to first try everything else other than giving them a Schedule II highly addictive, not safe, somewhat effective drug at six, seven years old. I heard case is five years old, four-year-old, right? We all know the human brain isn't fully developed until our mid-twenties. So we're playing Russian roulette with our child's brain because we're being told that it's safe and effective. I hope that kind of illustrated it a bit for you.

SPEAKER_01 25:23

Yeah, well, um that that that absolutely did uh answer my question. But let's talk about the chemical imbalance theory, explain what that is and explain if it's real or not, in your opinion.

SPEAKER_00 25:34

Yeah. So I'm not an expert in, you know, uh neuroscience and and psychiatry. But from what I've seen is that the chemical imbalance theory is something that parents were told, not just parents of children with ADHD, but also adults were told that there is a chemical such a thing as a chemical imbalance, and that's why you have depression or anxiety or ADHD, right? And what they weren't told is that there was a time when that term was invented by the pharmaceutical um marketing or advertising industry, right? The people uh hired to market these drugs for the pharmaceutical companies. And what they were basically trying to say that if they looked at it the reverse way, they said, hey, we tested these humans and we gave them our drugs, and we realized that XYZ chemical went up or down. So basically, we now know that there was some kind of a uh a balancing that was happening, right? But if you think about it, there is never a balance. I mean, I'm just talking to you, Curtis, and to our listeners. I'm a regular person, you know. Like if we talk to each other with common sense and we're like, what does that mean to have a balance chemically in your brain? How do you measure that? And when do you measure that? Because here's the the thing. When you do an MRI or a brain scan or something where you can see what the brain is doing, they're all composites, right? They take like whatever, hundreds of photos and they lay it on top of each other, and you go, like, okay, this is what the brain was doing at that time. But we don't usually add the words at that time, because think about it. If if you were to walk through a dark alley and I jump out of the darkness at midnight in a dark, scary alley, and I scare you. In that moment, if I was able to do a brain scan of your brain the moment the moment after I scared you, would I see a different snapshot of your chemicals in your brain than before I scared you? Absolutely. Of course. Your entire system is suddenly triggered or activated, right? So, not only is it not fair to say, what do you mean by balance? Where is the balanced brain? Show me a balanced brain. And what and who measures it? And what are we measuring? And not only that, but also when is that being measured? So, in other words, it was invented by the pharmaceutical industry to say, look, there's something off in your brain, and we have the answer, right? That was the whole marketing ploy. And there's a very famous doctor, Dr. Joanna Moncrief out of Britain. I've had the pleasure of meeting her at a conference last year, and she's written several books about it, debunking the chemical imbalance theory. And there's others now that have followed. So for me, it's not even parents can Google that. Just Google um, you know, chemical imbalance theory, Joanna, Joanna Moncrief, or just debunking of chemical imbalance, right? Because the problem is that the term has stuck around and people still feel like, even, and I say this for depressed people, they go, There's something off in my brain. Maybe. I mean, I struggle sometimes. I sometimes feel like something's off in my brain, and it probably is, you know, moving around or shifting or rewiring at times when we have this moment of depression. But that's all made up. There is no chemical imbalance in your brain. It's just it's our environment and ourselves creating um the mood that we're in. And sometimes we get stuck in it and we keep repeating it in a loop, and now we think there's something wrong with our brain. No brain wiring can be changed into old age. Like that's neuroscience has proven that already, you know, uh, neuroplasticity. Um, you're never really stuck with a certain brainwiring unless you keep thinking the same thoughts and you stay in the same state. All that to say, um, yeah, there is no chemical imbalance. It's not something people can measure.

SPEAKER_01 30:17

Well, talk about some alternative things their parents can do to help with uh kids' uh ADHD behaviors.

SPEAKER_00 30:24

Absolutely. So, number one really is like um, again, like I said, the parents got to do their work, right? So, with the families that I've worked with, um, they came to me and I said, Hey, we have a child with ADHD, what do we do? Um, sure, I met the child, kind of felt it out, you're right. And then I would say, okay, so now let the child live, go to school, have fun, whatever, and I would talk to the parents. So all that to say that parents need to do their work first. Why not? What what's the what's the um what's the downside? There's no downside. Think about it. If both parents go to therapy, if the father that's an alcoholic or the mother that's a workaholic, if they go to a 12-step program, or if they really work on removing the stressors in their own lives, well, there's only benefits that come to the family, right? So that's number one. Number two is really uh, first of all, again, realizing there's nothing wrong with your child. Your child's not broken. And then it's try things out. We did the process of elimination. One thing that's really cool, and I can never say it was the thing that worked, but we tried it, amongst other things, was biofeedback, neurofeedback. Uh, the child gets basically uh nowadays they may make it with these caps with the nods, you know, the sensors on it, but it used to be just sensors that get put on the child's, usually on the head, I believe. And then they're it's almost like they're playing a video game without with without a joystick. They're actually using their thinking or their willing, if you want to call it that, to move the object in the video game. And it's really fascinating. And we did some of that, um, seem to, you know, again, it's hard to um uh isolate one treatment because we did so many. Diet's important. Uh, our son was told early on that he's kind of uh because of his sensitivity that he should not eat a lot of gluten. That was that was just something that one of the doctors said. So tried that out. Uh, dairy was the same thing, no dairy, no gluten. So we did that for a while. Um, and you know, eventually he started eating it again, and it's all good, but you have to try things out. And then obviously the obvious is like, you know, not too much sugar, everything in moderation, right? Same with screens. Um, exercise is a big one. So one thing we've learned is that hand eye coordination sports, right? Like tennis, ping pong, baseball, those are really good for children who are labeled as neurodiverse or say ADHD. Um, those are great sports because, again, it's hand eye coordination. There's a dynamic that needs to be right for them to be played, the play the sport well, and that helps uh rewire the brain as well and with focus, right? Um, other than that, I would say we we tried certain uh trauma, um, it's called uh somatic um experiencing somatic, there's somatic like you know, trauma massages, things that help to uh release uh trauma and stress that's trapped in the body. You know, one of the uh people I interviewed was uh Bessel Vanderkolk, uh who's a wonderful man who wrote a book called Uh The Body Keeps a Score. And he makes a point, and so many people it resonated with so many people, and it's all based on science and uh also therapy uh experience that he's had working with veterans and and other uh people, but he clearly showed that you know, trauma, stressors, impact in our childhood gets trapped in our body. And so massages, stretching, um, we tried that out with our son. We did crane, what is it called? Craniosacral stimulating of the head. Um, you know, there's probably some other ones we tried, but those are the main ones, right? We tried what we could afford at the time and we would do something for six months and then we pause. But look, inside all of that, the best thing you can do for your child is to let them unfold and to trust that they will be okay in the future. If you do your work, if you as a parent work on yourself and bring love and understanding and patience and presence and emotional intelligence to your child, they will turn out. They will be fine. Because, you know, as parents, especially, but just as human beings, we're so concerned. We want we want certainty, we want safety, we want comfort, and we want it all to work out the way we think it's gonna work out. Well, I'm here to say that's all getting blown to smitterenes, like the way the world is looking today, and I'm not talking about world events, I'm just saying, like, spiritually seen, we're starting to realize a lot of us are waking up and realizing that, well, life inherently is uncertain. There's no certainty. It's humans we're trying to be certain, right? It's kind of like a warranty or a guarantee. A warranty is saying, look, we know it's gonna break at some point. So when it does, we'll just get you a new one, right? But you can't guarantee that this product will never break. That's why we call it a warranty. But as humans, we live as if we were for sure believing in guarantees. Like this has got to work out the way I want it to work out. Well, there are no guarantees in life, right? Things are changing, and so I'm saying all that to make the point that I believe our next generation of parents is gonna be or forced to be more flexible, more um grounded, less helicopter parents, less bubble wrap the children, less they gotta go to the Ivy League track, right? Less um scared, less anxious. Because there's no like we've it's almost like we've tried the anxious, fear-based resilience and grit and grind, and you know, overnight millionaire. We we we've we've explored that. It's not working. So I believe what parents can do is allow their children to unfold and become who they want to become, versus to mold them into who the parent thinks they should become. That's an old paradigm that didn't go so well for most of us. So that's kind of my advice to parents is like realize that you have an opportunity at hand. If your child has been diagnosed with something like ADHD, I always say to parents, good, that's a check engine light. That is a child telling you, this world, my home, this environment, my school, my family, too much stress. I can't, I can't be present. It's too much. I don't want to be present. I don't feel safe. I'm bored, whatever it is, right? They're telling us, and Gabor Mate says it beautifully. He says, when a child is acting out, he said that's a bit like charades. They don't really have the vocabulary yet or the intelligence to tell us exactly what they're feeling and what they want to let us know, but they're acting it out. So they're telling us something is going on, but then we call it, oh, my son's acting out all the time. So got to put him on med so he doesn't act out. Well, that's like putting a duct tape on your check engine light and then hoping that the car is going to keep running, but that's really ignorance, right? So yeah, that's that.

SPEAKER_01 38:36

Tell us about any any upcoming projects that you're working on that people need to know about.

SPEAKER_00 38:43

Well, to be honest, right now I'm really excited about the alignment coaching that I started. So I have an event coming up in OHI, California that is for men, like I said, men in their midlife crisis, uh, to align themselves, right? Because I'm a big believer that for the first part of our lives, and that's why they call that a midlife crisis, we've kind of, you know, manifested or created ourselves to be who we thought we should be. And then we get to the middle of life and we realize, damn, I have all this stuff, or I tried this, and this is who I am, but I'm not fulfilled. What's missing? And then, of course, there's the joke get a buy a red sports car, convertible, go on a vacation, whatever, right? Become a millionaire, so then you'll be fine. But what it is is that the first part of our lives, we we manifest things in life, we create them or collect things from a misaligned um state, meaning we think that's who we are, we think that's what we should need, you know, should get in order to be happy. So I help men transition through a midlife crisis. A lot of men today are like, look, I I don't know what I don't know what I want to do next, or what I don't want to do what I've done so far, but I don't know what I want to do next. And so my coaching is to have these men, this is just who I you know focus on as men, because I've been through that experience uh twice in life, uh, to really hone in on who they are. What why are they here? Why are they on this planet at this time? What are what are they here? What's the purpose? Right? And then align with that. And now when they manifest or create something in life, they're more fulfilled because it's who they are and it's what they want to create. So that's what I'm doing with men. There's gonna be a a workshop here in OHI in November, and then I'm launching, you know, the coaching business based on that. There's probably gonna be a YouTube channel and maybe a podcast to go along with it. But for me, to be honest, ADHD is over, will be over at the end of this year. You know, I always joke, like that's why I called it that way, because at some point it's over, and it's gonna be over for me, and it's been over for my son for a long time ago. He does not identify with that label, he's never taken medications. Um, he's doing just fine, graduating high school next year. He's got a job, you know, he's a very bright mind, and he's not hyperactive or impulsive anymore. Um, so really proud of him. And yeah, so that's what I'm working on. And uh hopefully to have that documentary finished by the end of this year, put that out there, and then uh we'll see. I just want to be of service and help other men go through this.

SPEAKER_01 41:19

Well, so uh people can keep up with everything that you're up to, and congratulations on your son. Don't have your contact info.

SPEAKER_00 41:26

Thank you. Yeah, absolutely. Um, basically, www.adhdsover.com is the best place to um stay tuned because I will direct listeners and readers from that website eventually over to the new website. Uh, and um I'm always available for emails, feedback, or if anybody wants to be a guest on the show or has the suggestions, I do get back to people.

SPEAKER_01 41:51

Yeah, and kind of tell us about that podcast uh real quick, let listeners know what they can expect when they hear it.

SPEAKER_00 41:57

Yeah, so you mean the ADHD's over?

SPEAKER_01 42:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 42:02

Yeah. So ADHD's over is a combination of expert interviews and what I call downloads, uh rants, where I take a topic and I myself, I always say I channel this from the universe. I don't write it down, I don't make it up, I didn't invent it. Um, so like I said, I have guests like Dr. Gabor Mate, um, Bruce Lipton, Stephen Porges, Peter Levine. And I just have very, you know, frank conversations about just like some of the questions you asked about uh chemical imbalance or genetics or medication, right? And so that's what uh if if you're gonna check out the the um uh podcast, I highly recommend you start at the beginning with episode one because it kind of lays the foundation of like, you know, what's the context here when you say ADHD is over? What do you mean? Um, and then you know, you can listen to one or two episodes early on, and then you can jump around. There's about a hundred and sorry, 250 episodes, I believe we're at now. Um, so yeah, that's kind of um that's the gist of it.

SPEAKER_01 43:10

We'll close this out with some final thoughts, maybe if that was something I forgot to talk about that you would like to touch on, or any final thoughts you have for the listeners.

SPEAKER_00 43:18

Yeah, I mean, uh look, I think with with your title of the podcast, and you know, I've always been a believer of follow your dream. And now at 56 years old, I have a whole new understanding of what that means. I always thought that if someone says, I'm gonna follow my dream, that that was the dream they had at whatever age, and that's what they were gonna do. And look, some of us, yes, some of us do that at a young age. Like, for example, I just use Ronaldo or Messi as the soccer players as the World Cup's coming up. They at an early age of like, I don't know, six, seven years old, said, I want to be a professional soccer. Soccer player, and that's all they did, right? And they're successful at it. So some of us, great. Most of us, though, I feel that we have a dream and we follow that. So for example, I had the dream of becoming an actor and I followed that. And then I shifted over to filmmaking, and then I followed that. And then that took me to opening my own company as an entrepreneur. Did that, and then it took me to investing in commercial real estate. And then you know, so my point is you follow your dreams or your impulses, and eventually you will it will lead to you to your purpose. Because not everybody is given their purpose right off the bat. And look, even Ronaldo or Messi may realize in 10 years they're retired and suddenly they're like, oh my God, I want to fly to Africa and I want to open an orphanage, and that's what I want to do, right? Who knows? But my point is, I'm here to say, yes, follow your dreams and always be open to where it needs, where it leads next. Because if your dream or your the activity that you're pursuing at the moment is not fulfilling, it seems to be more work, more frustration, more whatever, right? Exhaustion, then it's time to move on. And it's okay to move on. I've moved on many times. There's no need to feel guilty about it. Just keep following your dreams and just stay flexible, stay in the flow. And I guarantee you that fulfillment in the end is more important than success, or more important than having a straight line of your career, right? You you can have squiggly lines and you can have detours. Um and it's okay. You will eventually get there. And I tell my boys, and I close with that, I tell my boys always, like, if you don't know what you want to do, at least you'll know what you don't want to do and don't settle. Keep moving and keep moving, and you will find it.

SPEAKER_01 46:02

Absolutely, ladies and gentlemen. And you know, if you are a parent or somebody with ADHD, or you know somebody that might be a parent and have having kids with ADHD, visit adhdsover.com and check out uh Roman's film and you know, check out all his other films and everything that he's gonna be up to, and check out his coaching service as well if you think that'll help you too. And follow rate review, share this episode to as many people as possible. Also, to keep up with all things living the dream, please visit www.curveball337.com and share the website and the show to everybody that you know. Thank you for listening and supporting the show. And Roman, thank you for all that you're doing and your perspective and you know, trying to help people and make the world a better place. And thank you for joining me.

SPEAKER_00 46:57

Thank you, Curtis. Appreciate you.

SPEAKER_01 47:00

For more information on the Living the Dream with Curveball podcast, visit www.curveball337.com. Until next time, keep living the dream.